Do you ever feel like your emotions run your life? If so, does your life often feel like a roller coaster? Or do you find yourself constantly shoving down your emotions but then feel numb and out of touch? If either of these are true for you, then keep reading!
The topic of emotions is complicated to say the least. And I’m no expert. But I do want to share some thoughts and observations I’ve had with my own emotions. If you are like me, you’ve probably dealt with both of the extremes I just mentioned at some point in your life. The first being, allowing emotions to rule your life. The second being, shutting them down and feeling disconnected and numb. I’ve done both. Neither of these extremes have served me, or those around me.
Are our emotions right or wrong? Do we live by them or attempt to get rid of them? From my experience, the answer lies neither here nor there. So then, how do we control them? If we aren’t allowing them to control us, nor are we getting rid of them, we must need to control them right? I believe that emotions are not meant to be controlled, they are meant to be felt.
Emotions can be incredibly helpful for us if we learn to have a healthy relationship with them. God created us with emotions. Therefore, they cannot, in and of themselves, be wrong. He made us to feel deeply, to love wildly, to empathize profoundly, and to care fiercely. He created us to feel touched in our very souls by a piece of music, to feel brave when standing up for those without a voice, and to feel immensely proud when a loved one chooses to trust God’s plan for them.
Sometimes we’re filled with other emotions. Sometimes we feel grief, sadness, bitterness, jealousy, and anger. God created us to feel a large array of different emotions. Even though these emotions don’t feel pleasant, they are still there to help us if we allow them to. Emotions give us an enormous amount of information about what is going on inside our hearts and souls. To ignore our emotions or stuff them down leaves us trying to navigate through life blindly, missing out on all this information.
It’s important that we begin to be curious about our emotions. If we are, we can learn a great deal. Don’t treat any emotion as wrong or right. Just be curious about it. Ask yourself, “why am I feeling this way?” When you allow yourself to be curious instead of shutting those emotions down, you will find that you will be able to process them in a healthy way. Those emotions may show you an injustice that needs action. Or they might show you the areas in your heart that need to change. When we take the time to dig deeper, we will be able to connect the “why” with the emotion and that will help us know how to move forward.
We then take action on the clarity we receive by processing our emotions. We don’t act out of our emotions. Those are two very different things. I’ll give you an example. Say I’m feeling jealous of a friend who is having success in an area of life that I’m not. If I act out of my emotions I might put that person down with my words to try to feel better about myself. But if, instead, I take the time to process the feelings I’m having, I may realize that I’m feeling jealous because I’m believing a lie that God has abandoned me. I’m feeling like He’s blessing others but has forgotten about me. So instead of attacking my friend, I take action to surrender this lie to God and fill my heart and soul with what He says: That He will never leave me or forsake me. That He loves and cherishes me. That He has good plans for my life. When I remember this, I’m able to walk confidently in these truths while also cheering my friend on and being grateful for how God is working through her.
Wow. Quite a difference right? So next time you feel an emotion pop up, don’t judge it. Instead, sit with it. Feel it. Be curious about it. Express it by journaling about it or by talking about it with someone safe. Ask yourself “why” you feel that way. Don’t try to shove it down. Let it help you. Process through it before taking action.
What is your go-to when it comes to your emotions? Do you tend to live on a roller coaster? Do you stuff them? Or are you curious about them? Leave me a comment, I’d love to know!
If you want a head start in your journey to becoming the person God created you to be, I’ve made some printable journal pages that are yours for free! You can click here for yours. Download those and use them each morning to really start your day off right!
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